Ages ago I started writing a post about new best friends, said slightly tongue in cheek about the perception of your NCT group. Much of the stereotype is true and definitely for the mothers. They quickly formed their own non-boys NCT whatsapp chat and that was it. The boys were cut adrift. I really should make the effort and create the boys one. This next paragraph i wrote just after our first NCT class and is weird looking back at that.
“So we had our first NCT class this week, everyone who has been have said the people in this group will be your new best friends. So there you are sat in a self help circle checking each other out and thinking can we be friends? I am pretty cynical in this situation and had also spent the week sat in a circle with a team at work trying to work out how to work together and this felt very much like that to start with. The usual ice breakers of I’m Rob and I am here with Emma, bit of swapping partners and getting to know each other, no not in that way.”
After the first week we lost one couple to an early birth, the rest of the sessions flew by and then it was over. I am not sure what I learnt during that time, I definitely can’t recite any of the classes. I do know other dads were more prepared, had read more, had plans! I didn’t, actually we did do a good job of buying everything we needed and think the classes and talking to each other spurred us on to do so. I am not sure if this has helped with everything that has gone since. I can change nappies, am comfortable with Sofia, bath her, carry her around, play with her… It didn’t help with the birth, I could have been more prepared for that but then the night played out so differently to the what we discussed and as a dad you are so remote from that process I don’t know if knowing how the baby would come out was of help. It probably helped the girls more as it was their own bodies.
Everyone if they can should definitely do it though. For Em moving to a new town it has been great and as a NCT group the girls have explored all the haunts and classes of the mother, baby massage, yoga, sensory, coffee shops, nurseries and more. The blokes have all met up one more time as part of the baby reunion which we did a few weeks back as a early halloween fancy dress, afternoon tea. Middle class you bet ya! Actually the blokes could all have a whatsapp group and I’m not in it but I’m also not sure when we’d find time to all meet up. Hopefully for my two months paternity I get invited to the girls whatsapp otherwise i am going to feel left out!
NCT which I am still not sure what it stands for should just be renamed to New Best Friends, at least for the girls.